This song is the result of my therapeutic work with Dr. David Russell in Connecticut.  Yes, therapeutic.  I was in therapy for some time trying to unravel, untwist and understand various wounds in my soul.  

He taught me two things that were vital: 1) that we are subconsciously controlled by our "secret life of memories, and 2) that memories can heal. 

Our memories have a life within us.  They are the feelings and emotions that control us underneath our conscious minds. For instance, a traumatic experience that we had at some point in time - is still there.  If we have not looked at it, evaluated it and processed it - it is still there.  It is alive.  It is the subconscious thought behind a lot of our actions.  Our behavior is shaped by our thoughts and experiences.  If that trauma has not been dealt with, then it is still there controlling you.  It still owns you.

Memories can heal.  When we think back on mishaps, trauma and bad experiences in general, the emotions associated with those experiences come back with the memory.  Again, if you have not found a way to deal with the negative inside of you, it still lives fully charged with the same emotions that it created.  Dr. Russell gave me the ability to look back at my son's death and my previous experiences of rape without the toxic emotions associated with those experiences.  They are memories that are not full of pain. He would always say, "they are just memories; they can't hurt you."  He helped me to heal my memories.  I am not carrying emotional baggage. You don't have to either.  Please seek help if you are suffering from past bad experiences.

The words in this song are key - "It's the secret life of those memories...."

By the way, in the song there is a French word in the song:  "etre" - is means "to be."

He tries to run, he tries so hard, he tries so hard to get away
From the darkness of the shadows from his past, but they won’t fade
The six-year-old that learned to lie is still trapped deep down inside
He holds the story he won’t tell of a boy who was traumatized

It’s the secret life of those memories
It gives the ways, it gives the means
The secret life of our memories
controls our life, controls our dreams
The secret life of our memories
behind the verb, “etre,” to be
The secret life of our memories
It’s a secret life

Everywhere she goes she carries the pain from all the little girls
They’re all inside and they’re alive in their secluded, private world
They want to be free; they want to be seen; they all want to have their say
They need her eyes so they can cry then they can be on their way

It’s the secret life of those memories…

Frozen at the time of their creation
Emotions give them illumination
Start the process of elimination
You can get over it, you can get through it
And free your life

It’s the secret life of those memories
It gives the ways, it gives the means
The secret life of our memories
controls our life, controls our dreams
The secret life of our memories
behind the verb, “etre,” to be
The secret life of our memories
It’s a secret life
Words & Melody by: Tomaca L. Govan
copyright Tomaca